The Gift
28 Jun 2010 Leave a Comment
So, as I was thinking about saving your purity for your spouse I thought up this story. It’s a boring title and frankly it’s not the most exciting story but it’s a illustration : )
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Once upon a time there lived a king who had two daughters. When the girls were very young their father gave them each a beautiful gem of great worth. The wise king knew his children were not old enough to have full possession of their precious gifts so he kept the gems in his own care until the princesses were older. Finally, the day came when the king decided that his daughters were mature enough to be responsible for their gifts. He called the girls to him and said, ” My children, these two gems are the greatest treasures in my kingdom. I give them to you to keep until you meet the man you will marry. Then you will each give this gift to your husband on the day of your wedding. But beware of those who would seek to steal your gift before it is time. Keep these gems as safely as you know how.”
And after many more words of wisdom the king handed the glowing gems to his daughters. Both girls thanked their father as they held the large gems. They took their gifts to their room and carefully placed them in carved chests to keep them safe. Every so often the princesses would take the gems out and lovingly polish them so that they continued to glow. They carefully protected their presents and they talked of giving the gems to their husbands one day.
Soon, the older sister began to have suitors and to tell them about her precious gift. One day one of these young men asked to see the gem. The princess obliged and let the young man handle her father’s present. The young man’s eyes began to gleam. Finally, he asked the princess if he might shave off a small sliver of the gem. He pleaded with her so sweetly that the princess agreed. No one would notice such a small piece missing, she thought. And the young man said he was going to marry her. So, what was wrong with him having a little of the gem now? But it wasn’t long after the young man took a sliver of the gem that he left. The princess was heartbroken – until a prince began to seek her hand. He too asked to see the gem. The princess showed it to him. The prince’s eyes began to gleam. Finally, he asked the princess if he might file off a small piece of the gem. He pleaded with her so sweetly that the princess agreed. After all, he said he was going to marry her. But not long after the prince had taken the piece of gem, he left. The princess was heartbroken – until another young man came. Same as the first two, this young man took a sliver of the princess’s gem and left. As she grew older the princess had many young men, courtiers and princes as suitors. Each of them asked for a piece of her gem until finally the present her father had given her was unrecognizable. It was a tenth of the size it had been and it’s beautiful glow had been rubbed away by many hands. No longer did she have a precious gift to give the man she would marry.
But the younger sister heeded her father’s words and kept her gem safe. Every so often she would take it out of the chest and polish is gently. As she looked at it she would dream of the day she could give it to her husband. Many suitors sought her hand. Many young men, courtiers and princes asked to look at her precious gift. But the princess saved the gem and would not let anyone take even the smallest sliver from it. Finally, she met the prince of her dreams. With the king’s blessing they were married. On their wedding day the princess presented her husband with a gift – a glowing gem, polished and untouched by another. And the prince presented his bride with a gift – a glowing gem, polished and untouched by another. And their love lasted for the rest of their lives.
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The ‘gem’ each princess was given is their purity. Each of us is given a precious gift by God (the king). He has given us purity. And on our wedding day we will be able to present our spouse with this beautiful gift if we have kept it for them. When we are young our parents watch out for us and help us to guard our purity as the king did in the story. But when we are old enough we have full responsibility for this gift. The first sister gave away pieces of her gem and then had nothing to give her husband. We have to beware of doing the same. When we don’t guard our purity we are giving away pieces of the gift that should be saved for our spouse. Instead of saving our first kiss for our husband or wife on our wedding day, we give it away to someone else. Instead of giving our spouse that first romantic touch, we give it away to someone else. Instead of giving our spouse the gift of sex, we give it away prematurely to someone else. And then, like the first sister, the gift we present our spouse is very small and void of beauty. But it doesn’t have to be this way. We can choose to be like the second sister who saved all of her gem for her husband. We can save sex, our first kiss and everything else for our spouse. That is a gift worth waiting for. That is the gift I hope to give my husband on our wedding day. That is the gift I pray he gives me. Save your gem for your spouse. Don’t let others chip it away and degrade it. Save your purity.
What I Want a Young Man to See in Me
03 Jun 2010 Leave a Comment
in Beauty, Believers, guys and girls, Uncategorized, Waiting
This is a poem I wrote three or four years ago. My mom often says that not only should we look for the perfect spouse, but we should try to be the perfect spouse. That’s not to say that we should all be perfect – no one’s perfect. But we should try to be the best spouse we can be. I hope I can be a Proverbs 31 kind of woman for my husband. This poem is more of a prayer than anything else. I pray that these are the qualities a young man will see in me.
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What I want a young man to see in me
Is a young lady whose friendship will be
That of a sister’s and nothing more so
We can just be good friends until older we grow.
But when I am old enough someone’s wife to be,
This is what I hope a young man will see in me:
I hope a young man should not turn and stare
Because I am popular or outwardly fair
Or because I have money to share
Then I would be ashamed for him to care
What I want a young man to see in me
Is that I am mature spiritually
And when looking at me, I want him to know
I greatly love God and in His Word seek to grow
What I want a young man to see in me
Is that I don’t take purity as just an odd fantasy
I hope he will realize I’ve kept myself pure
I’ve saved myself for my husband, of that he can be sure
What I want a young man to see in me
Is that I do things for God, not so others can see
That I’m cheerful and willing in all of my work
That I do my jobs well and complaining I shirk
What I want a young man to see in me
Is one who will a help-meet and encourager be
Someone who shares in his thoughts and his dreams
And together make one of the best man-and-wife teams
When I want a young man to see in me
Christian qualities that make up true beauty
Is when he is old enough to for a family provide
When he is spiritually mature and will in wisdom abide
Until the time comes that I am old enough to
Be considered as a life-long companion who will be true
I will treat all young people as sister or brother,
It is silly to treat one person more important than another
So right now what I want a young man to see in me
Is a friend who a sister to him will be.
Why?
09 Mar 2010 Leave a Comment
in Dating, Love, Marriage, Modesty, Purity, Singleness, Waiting
Why don’t I have a boyfriend? Why am I willing to pursue complete purity even if it means being single when everyone around me has a ‘special someone’? Why do I take the time to shop for modest clothes when the ‘in’ styles are easier to find and will get me more attention? Why do I go to marriage seminars with a bunch of married people? Why am I so passionate about saving myself for someone I’ve never met? Why do I take the time to read books on how to have a godly marriage? Why do I take the time to prepare for a marriage that is still way off in the future? Why?
Sometimes I ask myself these questions. Here are some of the answers I remind myself of. I hope this will give you a clearer idea of what this blog is all about.
First, I want my husband and I to be a strong team. I want us to carry out the Lord’s will for our lives. Already, God has called me to be a missionary in Africa and I know my husband and I will be living on the mission field. For us to be a good team we need to be close. To trust each other. I want to support my husband. I want to be his encourager and cheerleader even when things are bad. By going to marriage seminars and reading Christian books on marriage, I’m learning how to become one with my husband. I’m learning how to keep communication lines open. How to deal with anger and hurt. How to deal with difficulties and struggles in marriage (because those will come). I want to be prepared to be the best wife I can be.
Second, I want to be able to give myself completely to my husband. I want to be a pure bride. I want my husband to have no room for doubt that I have saved myself for him alone. By wearing modest clothes, I am not allowing anyone else to see what should be only for my husband’s eyes. By not ‘dating around’ I am saving my emotions and all of my heart to give as a pure present to my husband on our wedding day.
Third, I don’t want my kids to be afraid that their daddy and mommy might get a divorce. I am almost 17 years old and have never been afraid of my parents divorcing one another. I have seen them have disagreements and make up. I have seen them cry together. Often, I see them pray together. I’ve watched as my parents walked hand-in-hand over the fields by our house as my dad had to tell my mom that he had been laid off at work. I’ve seen them take care of each other when they are sick. I’ve seen them lovingly confront each other when they were wrong. I’ve seen their strength when they had to be away from each other for a long time. And I’ve never been afraid they might get a divorce. It’s not like I don’t know what divorce is either. Many of my friends and family have suffered from divorce. But I always knew my parents’ marriage was strong. I want my kids to have that assurance.
But most of all, I want to honor God with my marriage. I want people to look and my husband and me and see a reflection of Christ’s perfect love. Love doesn’t mean there won’t be struggles and suffering, but it means we will be true to each other no matter what. Unconditional love that points people to God.
Some people think I have too strict of boundaries. Some think I’m silly to be so ‘obsessed’ with purity. Others say I’m anti-dating. But when it comes to purity, I don’t want to be half-hearted. I’d rather error on the side of being too pure than on the side of not being pure enough. Yeah, it’s hard sometimes, but I’m waiting. I’m saving all my passion and emotions until I’m married.
Maybe you don’t completely agree with all my standards on purity, but I hope this gets you thinking about your own purity.
Laughing Bride
04 Mar 2010 Leave a Comment
in Believers, journaling, Love, Marriage, media, Purity, Waiting
Okay, the last few posts have been a little heavy so I thought I’d share something fun and lighthearted. A friend posted this on Facebook and I loved it. It’s hilarious but also has a great message. Have fun watching!
Waiting on the Lord
08 Jan 2010 1 Comment
in Marriage, media, Music, Singleness, Waiting
Waiting. In today’s culture waiting is almost a foreign word. The world tries to tell us, the teens, that we shouldn’t have to wait. That we should get whatever we want whenever we want it. But the Bible tells us differently.
“ Wait on the Lord; be of good courage and He shall strengthen your heart; wait, I say, on the Lord!” Psalm 27: 14 (NIV)
“But those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles, they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint.” Isaiah 40: 31 (NIV)
The song I posted here is from the movie Fireproof (an awesome movie about true love, by the way). Even though the song is associated with restoring a marriage, as I heard it on the radio today I discovered this song meant more. As young people, we need to wait on the Lord to bring us together with our future husband or wife. Yes, it’s hard to wait when the world tells us we shouldn’t have to. But we will wait because we know it’s right. And even though it might be painful, we need to worship God through it all. He’s painting the big picture. We can only see a part of it. Waiting on the Lord can teach us some of the most important lessons we will ever learn. Let’s commit to waiting on Him. He will bring the right husband or wife along when it’s time.
Let me challenge you, my fellow teens, to take this song as our battle cry. Waiting is hard. It can even seem like a battle. But with the Lord’s help we can do it. Listen to this song whenever you find it hard to wait for your future spouse. Take the chorus to heart: While I’m waiting I will serve You, while I’m waiting I will worship. Don’t forget to serve the Lord and worship Him. Use your single years for His glory.
Trusting God
08 Jan 2010 Leave a Comment
in Marriage, Singleness, Trust, Waiting
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths.” Proverbs 3:5-6 (NIV)
It’s hard to trust God. Especially about your future in regards to marriage. In my last post (here) I talked about needing to focus on the Lord first and foremost. It’s so easy to get sidetracked, though. As we follow God’s plan for our lives we are tempted to look around. Instead of being content in our singleness and using that for His glory we begin to question the Father’s plan or even try and ‘suggest’ other ways.I find myself doing this.
“Oh, God, did you see that young man who just passed by? He looked like ‘the one’. Are you sure I’m not supposed to go with him?”
God gently reminds us, “My child, they are going in a different direction from the one I have called you to go. Follow me. I have a special plan for you. And I have already chosen the man you will marry. Trust me.”
I turn back and continue to focus on the Lord. But it doesn’t take long to get distracted again. “God! God! There he is! I just know he’s ‘the one’! Look, he’s going…almost the same direction You’ve called me to go. And, and he is one of Your children!And, and he’s focused on You…for the most part…and he’s…”
The Father interrupts my excuses. “Child, focus on me. He is not going the same direction as I’ve called you to go.” He smiles down gently at me. “I have chosen your husband for you. Wait for him. It won’t be long, but for now, focus on me. Trust me.”
I know one day a young man will come up alongside me. He will be going the exact same direction as the Lord has called me to go. He will be focused on God too. I know my heavenly Father will bring us together. But I still get distracted easily. That’s why it’s a battle. A battle every day to focus on the Lord and to trust Him. To trust Him for the right husband. To trust Him for the right timing when I will meet my husband-to-be. To trust Him.
The good news is, God is much better at leading our lives than we are. We always tend to make a mess of things. If we commit our way to the Lord, though, He will make our paths straight. Don’t be afraid to trust God. Trust Him enough to be comfortable as a single. You don’t need to go looking for a husband or wife. God will bring them along when the time is right. “And that is an encouraging thought,” as Gandalf tells Frodo.
nataliecorder
